Entering The God Debate

My faith in God has largely been unshakable, at least for the most part of my life. In the years 2013 and 2014, I was questioning the existence of God. Does he exist? If yes, then where? Regardless to say that I was classifying myself as an atheist. At the same moment, I was trying to find a God and really believe in him and only him. What a dilemma! I was not who I was proclaiming to be and not even something that I expected to become. Before 2013, I would call myself religious but more spiritual and somewhere before 2008, I was a religious person who was slowly migrating towards a more spiritual journey.

As I look back at the events and the pace at which my emotions and feelings towards God have changed, I notice one central theme. I found that no matter who God was, I always knew what he was not. He was not an idol, he was not a picture and he did not demand anything. Yes, he did not even demand respect. He did not wish for shrines and temples to be built in his name and he also did not expect people to worship him. Great… then why was he even there? What did he want? Does he still want the same?

A little while ago, I thought that I should better be agnostic and not bother myself with the God debate. However, God is such an important and inseparable part of life that it becomes fairly difficult to avoid him. When I was more religious, I was completely baffled by the enormous display of grandiose that happens in the name of God. When I was more spiritual, I thought that religion and spirituality, though different, are quite inseparable in the beginning. When I turned towards an atheist state of mind, I thought that God doesn’t exist. Simple as that. I thought that God is imaginary. However, at the very same moment, I was also thinking how an imaginary entity could be so powerful that he becomes the ultimate saviour of thousands of people. Now, I have more agnostic thoughts and I still believe that there is something that we do not know about but I am not quite ready to know about it, not yet.

It is quite possible that there is a God. However, I think that he is nowhere close to what we believe him to be. He may not be messiah, he may not adorn his body in silken robes and gems and he may also not worry about us. Think about it. Do we worry about a tiny ant that lives somewhere close to our house. Of course, there are many of them but they are so tiny that they are completely irrelevant to the human unless he is being harmed. In a universe which is as huge as we know it, we are just a tiny dot in space. Will God ever bother to look at us? Are we really his favourite creatures? Does he really keep a check on what we all are doing and where life takes us? Does he care if we die? Considering the fact that the world is becoming an increasingly difficult place to live in and humans are turning worse than savages, will God really turn his back towards us and think about creating a new world?

I do not know the answers to these questions. I might never come to know during my lifetime. Our generations would live on this planet, destroy it and die and God would not have even blinked his eyes. This is not pessimistic at all. Some people might feel offended with this post but i believe that everyone has the right to his own God and this also means that we have the right to question God, whether about us or about him. Maybe, God is her and not him. Maybe he does not even have a gender. Maybe, his form is not human. It could be an animal, an insect or a bird. It could even be the black white dwarf stars in the sky, it could be the sun, the rains, the forests…. it could be anything and we will never know unless we start asking questions about it. Of course, there is no one who can answer our questions but we may at least move on and find a better understanding of God. We may not think of him as a messiah but as a friend, as a guide. We may believe that he also comes with virtues and flaws.

I have deep faith in God, yes. No matter what I thought about his existence, he was always a central theme in my life. The only issues was that I could not really associate my idea of God with the typical mascots or interpretations that were available to me. I could not justify that my God hates those who do not believe in him and loves those who perform rituals and give him offerings because they are scared of him. Well, there were many many thoughts that made me question the existence of God and I firmly believe that you should read them, question those thoughts and then find your own interpretations without creating a fuss about it. Trust me, if I was God, I would have wanted the same.

“अरे यार वो मेरे पीछे पड़ी थी…”

“ठीक ही थी यार वो. टाइमपास अच्छा हो रहा था मेरा… शुरू में मुझे लगा की चलो थोड़ी बातचीत कर लेते हैं. पर बाद में तो वो चेप ही हो गई…. जब देखो फ़ोन,… मेसेज….. बस. दिमाग ख़राब करके रख दिया उसने मेरा. …….. अरे हाँ तभी तो नया नंबर लिया है यार. उसको पता चल गया न तो इस नंबर पे भी जीना हराम करके रख देगी मेरा…

बैठे बिठाये मुसीबत मोल ले ली मैंने… बस ज़रा सा हवा दे दो मैडम को ऐसे उडती है आसमान में जैसे इंग्लैंड की रानी बन गयी हो…. पिछले महीने मैं लेके गया उसको मूवी देखने… फिर डिनर पे गए… फिर उसको उसके घर छोड़ने भी गया……

अरे बाकि का सुनके क्या करेगा… तू तो अपने भाई का स्टाइल जानता है…. हा हा हा हा….. अबे हाँ यार…. रात को मेसेज आने लगे…. रुक रुक पढके सुनाता हूं…. अरे कहाँ गया….. हाँ सुन… today was the best day of my life. I really really really love you…. हा हा हा हा……

ओफ्फो…. कसम से यार… उसके बाद तो ऐसे पीछे पड़ गई जैसे मुझे उसके बाप का उधार चुकाना हो… ओह माय गॉड… ऐसी लड़कियां वैसे मुझे अच्छी लगती है… बस एक डेट पे ले जाओ उसके बाद बात करो या न करो तुम्हारी मर्ज़ी… जब भी टाइम मिले बात कर लो… वैसे तो मेसेज और फ़ोन पे बहुत चेप हो जाती है लेकिन जब भी प्यार से बात करो न…… अबे हाँ भाई…. हा हा हा….. ऐसी बेवक़ूफ़ लड़कियां मिलती रहे तो तेरा भाई अगले साल सलमान खान को पीछे छोड़ देगा…. हा हा हा….

और उसकी वो फ्रेंड…. पता नहीं क्या समझती है अपने आप को… मुझसे लड़ने लग गई… कहती है की तूने मेरी फ्रेंड के साथ धोखा किया… तूने उसे कभी कुछ साफ़ साफ़ नहीं बताया…. हद हो गई… अब मैं उसको सामने से जाके कहूँ की मैडम मैं तो आपके साथ टाइमपास कर रहा था… हा हा हा… हाँ भाई हड़का दिया मैंने… बोल दिया की इतना ही प्यार है अपनी फ्रेंड से तो उसको मुझसे दूर ले जाये…. पता नहीं ये लड़कियां आपस में क्या क्या खिचड़ी पकाती रहती हैं….

अबे हाँ यार…. पीछे पड़ी थी मेरे… मैंने तो कान पकड़ लिए… आज के बाद अगर किसी लड़की ने मुझमे ज़रा सा भी इन्टरेस्ट दिखाया तो मैं तो पहले ही उससे राखी बंधवा लूँगा… कौन मुसीबत मोल ले… एक तो मैंने उसको इतना घुमाया फिराया… उससे बात तक की जब मेरा अपनी गर्लफ्रेंड से झगडा हुआ… ऊपर से इतना attitude….

चल छोड़ न उसे… पागल है…. तू बता… जिम जा भी रहा है या सिर्फ फालतू के पैसे भरे हैं???……”

How Our Energies Interact, Really?

In the last post, I was talking about the fact that we are not just people. Not just organisms with flesh, blood and bones. We are also the manifestations of energy. This is the energy that is stores in us all and often interacts with other people around. What I firmly believe is that we are all made of up of the same basic energy units but their proportion often makes us different from each other. I would like to refer to the concept of ‘Panch Bhoota’ (Indian/Hindi/Sanskrit) here. These five elements are supposed to be the very essence of human life. When you are born, you start life with a very unique combination of these 5 elements and when you die, these elements dissipate into thin air, only to be reborn again.

The 5 elements are:

1. Prithvi or Earth

2. Agni or Fire

3. Jal or Water

4. Aakash or Sky/Ether

5. Vayu or Air

If I focus on this simple concept, I find that these 5 elements can easily be translated into atoms. Are we not all atoms? Are we not energies? Yes, certainly. This information is, in one way, enough to suffice that we are indeed interacting with nature and people in ways that we never imagined.

Can you guess why some people are instantly attractive while others become repulsive even when you do not know anything about them? Maybe, just maybe, we sense their energies and their aura. We are able to decode the message that their energy field is sending to us. This message is to subtle that words are unable to define them. However, as beings which are able to experience energies, we shall certainly be able to decode them even if we don’t know it consciously. Now, this may mean that we are spiritual creatures as well. We experience a lot of things that we are not aware of and as far as I can guess, this is one of the reasons why we feel very uncomfortable in some places and with some people. It is quite possible that that the energy field or the aura of a person or a place starts sending us signals that are decoded into ‘alarming’ or ‘relaxing’ by our very own energy senses.

It is not just human bodies that possess these energy fields. The things that we eat, the things that we use and the Earth that we inhabit are all a part of this huge energy ball. In fact, I have started to view the Earth as a very small energy field of the universe. There could be many more like us and there could be even more that are completely different from us. The head and tail of the matter is that we are matter and when we die, we are just changing forms. We are carrying many experiences with us in the next state. These could be great, horrifying or simple meaningless to us. It is also possible that a huge number of these experiences are also lost in transit. By the time we enter the new state of matter and probably lose some energy and gain the energy of a few other particles, we are totally refreshed but still retain something from a past state. Think of this as a chemical reaction. The Earth is our test tube, or a beaker if that works better for you. We are all in this apparatus, consistently changing forms, losing our valence electrons in the form of time or maybe emotions and gaining some more electrons in the form of chemical bonds which we call emotions.

All this is such a beautiful system of being. Can you imagine why we change after a relationship, especially when it is over? Can you think why we need to be with people. Can you think why being in a room with empty walls and no humans, pets or furniture can be so maddening? It is because we need to interact with other energies. If we do not, we are not successful as humans. Interactivity or energy is very basic and must definitely be achieved if we wish to survive. We leave an impression of our energy on all people we meet and all things that we have used and own. Similarly, these things and people leave a lasting impression on us as well.

Why don’t you find some time to reflect on these thoughts today? It is a beautiful winter morning and I believe that today is going to be fairly tiresome for me, mentally… intellectually.

People and Energy Interactivity

I was exposed to a lot of people and philosophies lately. Though nothing really happened in my life apart from a plan for a huge career shift, a lot happened with people who were really close to me. These people, I believe, are the very extensions of my own self.

They faced many issues in life and I was lucky enough to share the burden with them. However, as the time passed by I got to learn a lot of things. The first one was that the number of people in your life doesn’t really matter. If you just have one person who would stand by you when you really need them, your life is going to flow in a great direction.

Actually, we believe in letting a lot of people enter our life and that hardly makes any sense. It is because we are not just ‘people’. We are atoms, we are energy and that is unique to everyone. As a matter of fact when people get to be a part of each other’s lives, they bring their points of view, their positive and negative forces and even the burdens of their past.

Our energies are composed of our experiences and it is quite important to see whether these energies interact well with each other. Now, i don’t say that there is some magical way in which you can reas the energy of another person. However, when you make a decision to let someone enter your life, you are letting your energies interact with each other and that too in a very intimate way.

This is why people who have never met each other and interacted through other means of communication still feel a connection. Meeting someone directly or living with them means more energy interactivity. However, even when I am talking to someone on the phone, a small part of our energies are interacting and they are bound to leave an impression on both of us.

Therefore, if you can handle all the people and their energies, it is fine. However, if you are like me and like to keep it simple then go ahead and meet a lot of people but save most of your energy for yourself. Let go of a good part of your energy to your loved ones.

It is a three fold path. Follow 50:40:10 rule. Save 50 for yourself, 40 for your loved ones and just 10 for the rest. Try it. I am sure you will experience a lot of great things. I will tell you more about what i learnt in later posts.

What happens after 40 (to your parents and you)

Age is scary to some (all). It appears that every passing birthday, we feel burdened. How i remember The Solitary Reaper? The one with a bent back, the one who needs to toil. While the advertising industry and pretty much everyone is worried about turning 30, I am busy thinking what would happen when you turn 40. Actually, what would happen when your parents are moving towards 50? At 46 or 47, they already have children who have a life of their own, they have spent a long long time with their spouse and they are quite free now. There is no need to run after children and feed them and there are no school projects to make. There will be no ‘pados wali sharma aunty’ who will compare the marks of every child in the ‘mohalla’ and later start looking for a suitable match for your kids. Life is almost at a standstill. What next?

The plight of our parents is beyond our understanding. At least, i do not understand what they go through on those long summer afternoons. Some of them are busy working in their offices while others, especially our mothers, are enjoying their solitude at home. There are less people to cook for and even lesser to talk to. Our life is busy for sure and we don’t really know how to help them. Even a great Sunday brunch or a visit during Diwali will not be of help. They will be alone and we really do not have a hint or an idea of what to do. A little dream calls us to faraway lands and a little ache in the heart does not let us leave them behind. Every body talks about the pain for children that parents feel. No one, and I mean NO ONE, ever talked about the pain that children feel for their parents. Yes, we are the ones who will ask you for money and expect gifts and understanding every time. Yes, we feel lonelier than you are and find ourselves helpless. 

What can be done? 

Keep Me In Your Heart

Keep me in your heart

I may not be there tomorrow

I ll be gone and you might not even get the news

That someone who loved you, can love you no more

‘coz death puts an end to a lot of things

I don’t want it to be our love, not so soon.


So if I cry or if I weep,

I just need a warm hug

And if I bring gifts

I just want you to accept them

Nothing more was ever desired

I like to give gifts,

I am wired that way

But if I am wired to you,

I wouldn’t mind it anyway.


You are closest to my heart

Like a couple of our friends

And you mean a lot to me

Smothering you was never an option

But mothering you will always be.


You are on my mind

Like the clock keeps ticking all the while

And if it ever stops…

Your tender clock will be dying.

So keep me in your heart

Keep me for another while

I wont always be all good

But I wont always be servile.


Our lives have taken different turns

And aloof I might seem

But who are separated in the middle of a life

Are always united in dreams. 

Why Are You Unemployed Or Underemployed (Part 2)

Some of you like what I said in the last post and some of you did not. Well that is how opinions are shared, criticised and respected. Anyway, moving ahead, let us have a look at some more reasons why people are unemployed or underemployed. Mind you, this time, I am going to adopt a totally different perspective on things and I hope that some of you would be able to relate with it. Honestly, even I had to face all this when i was about to graduate from college. This can be universal or can be restricted to a small group of people. Whatever it is, you decide. Have a look.


1. You are quite versatile- this is a blessing in disguise but most of us fail to recognise this. The fact is that there are a few people who are quite versatile. In fact, they are so good at getting things done that they are unable to decide what exactly would be right for them. As a result of this, they are always confused about what they must chose. Frankly, this blessing makes them have a hard time. It is like the Midas Touch. Whatever you touch would turn to gold but you are not sure what you must chose. Let us take an example. You graduated with a mass communications degree. You love hardcore investigative journalism but are equally attracted to light hearted magazine write ups. However, you end up writing scripts for a TV program. We cant say that you are bad at writing scripts. You are just too versatile and you would do everything well. Prioritising may help in this case. Think, prioritise and move ahead. Don’t chose one thing over the other or you are ready for doomsday in advance.


2. Work cultures don’t suit you well- yes, we all cannot fit into 9 to 5 cultures. Some like to work in the night, some like to be free to work while some others can only work in the mornings or evenings. Rest of their time is spent on Facebook or maybe near the coffee machine. When you are working in the wrong work culture, you would definitely have issues fitting in. I was working in an office in the beginning of my career where people came to work at 9 a.m. but started some real work only after 3 p.m. Till then, they were busy talking, playing or having lunch. I was more than a misfit. As someone who is all fired up in the morning who loses motivation in the afternoon and stays too creative around 6 p.m., this was not a good choice. As a result, I tried to adjust, lost my fire, then lost my motivation to work entirely. It can happen with you as well. A simple solution is to look for a kind of work that suits you and your style of work.




3. You like to wander- some minds are just wired like that. Some people find it extremely difficult to stick to one place for long. They cant handle the people or situations for long and continuously strive for change. This wanderlust may result in a number of changed jobs, a number of failed networking ideas and much more. Its not that these folks don’t like to work or are not creative, they just get sick of their surroundings too soon. Such people would have a number of interesting things on their resume but their time period would be too less. Consequently, they end up with cyclic employment. Sometimes they are working and the next time, they are not. Solution is simple. Learn to commit.


4. You are an entrepreneur- wohoo! sounds like a great idea. I would not have a boss, I would work on my own terms and I would be so damn successful. If this is your idea of entrepreneurship, please come back to reality. It is true that those who are entrepreneurs at heart are seldom employed anywhere else. They like to start things, experiment and strive to make things better for themselves and the people who are employed with them. You are an entrepreneur if you have an idea and the zeal to endlessly work on that idea no matter how many problems come in your way. If you are an entrepreneur and you feel unemployed or underemployed, develop an idea, work on it and follow your heart.


5. You are lazy- many people don’t like to work even when they like to earn money. I once met a man who told me that he did not wish to find work. Instead, he wanted work to find him. Well done boy! is that how you beat unemployment? Gather all your strength and start looking for a job or no one would be able to help you.


6. You are expecting way too much- a BIIIIG problem with recent college graduates is that their expectations are too high. They want jobs that pay well, they want a car, a house of their own and so much more. They find ideals in middle aged men and women who have spent half of their lives (almost equal to the age of a college graduate) in working day and night to achieve everything they have. They started small, did odd jobs, studied, got promoted and now enjoy the niceties of life. If you want to find ideals, don’t find ideals in pay stubs. Your first job can be crappy and it can pay you peanuts but that is exactly how you move on. No matter how educated, a fresher is a fresher and no one is going to pay for your Cadillac (Exceptions are always there).