How To Define a Friend


I have had so many friends till date… So many people have become a part of my life and shared memories that will always be cherished. I was always blessed to find people who understood me and I understood them. There were no talks about ‘hidden motives’ and why people did what they did. We were all good for each other and took care of each other. All was good.

Snap… Today is the day that most people who I have loved dearly in my very young years are gone. The perks of adulthood are finally taking a toll on my life. Look back and you see so many faces smiling at you. Look at the present and all the smiles you find are either fake, hiding contempt or fake, hiding a need to please me. I don’t want you to please me. If I am not naturally pleased by you, nothing in the world is going to change that. Understand this.

So it was only yesterday that I was talking about friends, you know the variety that goes for a long drive with you but don’t give a damn when you are lonely, sad or depressed. The friends who will laugh with you but will never come to your rescue when you need them. The friends who stay with you for some time and then are gone because they found something better.

I am kinda scared of the kind of people who always say yes. It is like being surrounded by yes men who would ruin your company one day. Of course, the negative ones should always be kept at bay. But this special variety of optimism should also be dragged out of your life. Maybe you cannot avoid them altogether, but you should definitely  be avoiding their 2 cents of advice. Trust me, their advice is worth nothing but 2 cents in the real sense of the word.

I too have people around me who would gladly say yes to everything I suggest. I have people who would suggest that I am always right. These people are preparing for the ultimate doom where I will make a bad decision and they will be gone for their own good. What kind of friends are they? Opportunists obviously.

She told me yesterday that you should be with people for as long as you want them. She also told me that she does not understand what I feel. God dammit! You claim to be my friend and if you don’t understand what I feel, who the hell would? I felt sad at the premise of the story. I was explaining why we are good people and why good people never turn into bad people, no matter what. I was explaining why we all deserve someone good and why we should be good.

I was explaining why we should not be with people because they are good for us or because we can ‘use’ them. She refused to understand. Of course, she was trying to justify that people have treated her with disrespect and contempt and that is the way of the world that we should blend into. Of course, I was telling her that  blending with the world is just another folly. Of course, I am not such a sinner.

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